One thing I have been thinking a lot about and reading sometimes is stuff on Motherhood. I know I have mentioned this a lot lately, but in the last few months I have really been trying to change my attitude about being a mother. When Anna was a baby I was always really frustrated because she didn't do things on MY schedule or MY way of thinking. As I've been reading the Dear Jane blog and other books and blogs I have realized that I have been a really selfish mother. I have had tears in my eyes many times as I have read the way other mothers teach their children always with love. Too often when things happen with my children I take things so personally and become angry and then I pull away. I'm trying to be better about understanding things from my children's' perspective instead of assuming that they think like I do.
I really have felt a lot more love for my children as I have tried to show more love and be more understanding. This way of mothering makes so much sense to me and really reflects the way I think our Savior would teach. I've read parenting books about natural consequences and other methods and they always seemed so formal and stiff to me. I love the way Jane talks about teaching and loving and helping children to learn to follow their own conscience rather than doing things because they fear the consequence. She also talks about how our world today is trying to make children grow up and be independent so early and they really don't need to. Is it really going to matter in the long scheme of things whether your baby learned to sleep on his own at 5 months or your toddler was potty trained before she was 2? I am learning that I don't need to rush my children into things and that I can just follow their lead.
The most important thing I am learning though is that there is no parenting method that will fit every child and the only parenting method that will always work is following the Spirit. The Lord know us and our children so well and if I will always seek him in prayer I know he will guide me in the best ways to teach and nurture my children. I am so thankful that I have the knowledge of the gospel of Jesus Christ. I cannot imagine trying to raise my children in this world without the knowledge of Heavenly Father's plan. I know families are eternal and that is why it is so important to love them! I love my family!
These three are my life!
4 comments:
Thanks for this post, Andrea. I really really REALLY needed to read it today. I am right there with you, except I think you are a few steps ahead of me. I get so angry with my kids lately and I have no idea what to do about it. I love the Dear Jane blog and am so glad you showed it to me! I think you are amazing. Thanks again for sharing!
I love this post. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on raising children. You inspire me! I need to slow down and do things on Lincoln's time table instead of trying to fit everything into my own schedule. I love the thought that kids don't have to be so independent so young, too. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and helping me be a better mom.
Your halloween costumes are awesome, by the way!
So true. Thanks for this. I totally found the Dear Jane blog from yours and she is awesome!
I think you're doing a great job! I remember what a stinker Anna was about sleeping and most of the time you were pretty darn patient with her. But you're right. It is always better to teach with love. I've been trying to notice which things/activities are the most important for each of my kids-you know the thing that they LOVE to do and that when you do it with them they feel loved. I've been trying to dedicate more time to those things and its been working pretty well. Hang in there. Being a parent is a HARD job and it takes LOTS of practice! Love ya!
Oh, and I just saw that it has been a year since I've updated my blog...Ha ha ha!
Post a Comment